Klingon Pre-Game

Posted on Fri Dec 11th, 2015 @ 1:00am by Ensign Corrine Steiner & Commander Jordan Gunning & Kestarah K'Mara

Mission: By Dawn's Early Light
Location: Lower Shuttlebay [Deck 1101]

[ON]

Starfleet graduates often feel butterflies on their first duty assignments. This was intensely true for a new redshirt keeping the peace at SB332 civilian space docks. Rumors of war were rampant. Anxious and frustrated people had less patience than normal. Crewman Umbleton participated in ritual argument with a Tellarite when he noticed an alarming sight. A group of Klingons were rolling what very much looked like a war-surplus Cardassian artillery cannon into the starbase.

Ignoring the insult that the Tellarite would feel, he broke into a run. "Excuse me." He dashed to catch up with the enthusiastic warriors.

Proud of their work, they smiled, "Look what we have!"

Another cackled, "Da! Those Sojourners will be in for a surprise!"

The Security Centre was enjoying a moment's peace. Most of the civilians knew their evacuation plans and routes and the section chiefs were reporting in positively on their assignments, which made a change.

An urgent call came into the base security, "Umbleton to Sec! I've got a problem!"

"They've got a what?!" Lieutenant Alayna Bancroft - who had taken the call - was incredulous. "Err, right. I'll have someone with you momentarily."

"Guv," the title Bancroft had taken to bestowing on her superior, Commander Jordan Gunning, a British thing apparently. "that was Umbleton apparently there's a bunch of Klingons rolling an artillery gun onto the station."

This wasn't the first suspiciously large piece of ordnance that some of the station's Klingon inhabitants had tried to get onto the station and the news led Gunning to roll his eyes and tap the comm panel on his desk. "Gunning to K'Mara."

Keys was busy at the moment doing something close to reading reports. "K'Mara here. What can I help you with today?"

"We've got more Klingon ordnance coming on board in one of the lower shuttlebays." He checked his readout. "Deck one-one-oh-one. Can you head down there and encourage them to take it back to where they found it?"

Kes growled. It was insulting time as well as time to find out what she could about the arms.

"Their mothers have smooth foreheads. They don't have the sense enough to know it either. I'll confiscate what I can and destroy what we can't use."

The new Klingon neighborhood volunteer defence force wasn't terribly organized.
"No! No! We must be ready to blow a hole in the outer shell! Invaders would be sucked into space!"
"No! Near a reactor! If we are overwhelmed, then we can blow it up and take all of our enemies with us!"

Poor Umbleton about whimpered as his translator registered ideas going from bad to worse. That wasn't his primary concern, however. The artillery cannon controls were active... and throwing the odd spark from time to time.

Kes wasn't an engineer. She had common sense, which sometimes was a rare commodity in this neck of the woods.

Kes yelled at the Klingon. "If you don't calm down, I'll be sending you back to the homeworld so fast your head will spin off your head!"

The intrepid gun crew paused, studying the newcomer for a few moments. They glanced around.
"Is she taking to us?"
"A female? How rude!"

To the other guy, she sputtered. "Look, Undead..."

The third man received his order, "Try to keep the power levels under control." The two men slowly approached K'Mara, folding their arms. "Where are your manners, woman? Warriors always earn a name!

"Whatever. Right now I don't honestly care what your name is. Today is always a good day to die. If something happens to you, I'll put enough money in your hand to pay your way over the River Styx. Now think!"

They squinted, not quite sure what to make of her.
"I recommend that you not scar her permanently. She is young and perhaps trying to impress us."
"Foolish children. Go home, woman-child. Learn proper respect from your elders!"
"And if you cannot learn from them, then find a husband who will teach you!"
"Ahahaha! If any would take her!"

Security guard Umbleton went ashen, "Oh no!"

Kes wasn't someone who liked to fight someone or someones who was unarmed and therefore unprepared to do a battle of wits with her. She said a lot of nasty things in both Klingon and Japanese about them.

"Now now, young fireling, you-" Sparks ruptured from the artillery gun's capacitors. "No overloads! Do you hear me? Not unless we are about to be overrun by the enemy!"

"There has to be some simple way to turn off the machine. Is there an off switch? Or maybe a power cord?" she asked the witless trio. She wondered what would happen if she overloaded her phaser in it, or maybe a broken mat'leth. This was not her problem. She had a problem with the Klingon 'contingency' and their cache of weapons.

"Off? Do you realize how long it took us just to get this thing powered up? You are timid? That is no way to earn respect, woman-child!"

"Respect has to be earned. Any respect that isn't earned isn't worth the person receiving it. Last time I looked, *I* was considered a warrior on my homeworld. But at this time, I don't have time to deal with your...." she wasn't sure what to call it, nor was she in a mood to deal with the idiots.

Officer Umbleton's training hadn't yet included peacekeeping Klingons. "Sirs, I must ask you to- WHOAH!"

One warrior lifted him up and tossed him to another. "I'm sorry, what was that? Speak up, smooth-head!"

The next caught the human and tossed him back, "I don't think he is accustomed to flying."

The lightly dazed man staggered about amidst amused chuckles.

The leader offered, "How about you, warrior'ling?"

"I'm not in the mood to have to train a guy how to treat a Klingon female. They can stay in their quarters and leave me the *bad word removed* alone," she said as she walked away.

"Hmmm, this will not do. Words are for Vulcans and Ferengi." The warriors examined the phaser that they had swiped during the Umbleton-toss. Being a stun-only model, it had no biometric security to it. "How quaint." The leader decided that the departing K'Mara needed inspiration in the form of a quick shot to her butt. Cackles of laughter ensued.

Kes felt it. That was it. Words were for those who used them. She, and they, were Klingon. It was time to settle this, Klingon style. She pulled her bat'leth from her back, where she wore it all the time. How the shot had missed the blade, she didn't know nor did she honestly care.

"It's time to settle this in OUR way," she told them, not really rushing them, but giving them time to draw weapons. She had met'leths stashed around her, just in case ANYONE tried to disarm her.

First they had the joy of artillery toy. Now they had some sport. It was a good day. The three men slowly surrounded K'mara, but none of them drew weapons. That wouldn't be fair. The leader slowly rubbed his hands together with a smile, "Do you actually know how to use that?"

Another jibed, "It looks too new. I bet she got it for her coming of age celebration!"

The leader tried to spook her, "BOO!"

On queue, another made a leap in an attempt to swat the weapon out of her hands.

She parried the blow and aimed for his shoestrings, to split them in two. She was going to toy with them for a bit before dealing with the problem like she really wanted to do it.

The two warriors roared with laughter at seeing their comrade outmaneuvered thus. Then, misfortune knocked at Kestarah's door. Officer Umbleton charged in with all due chivalry to fight back-to-back with her, "I'm with you!"

Unfortunately, the Klingon leader snagged him, picked him up effortlessly, and then tossed him at the woman, "I have found you a husband!" Again, cackles ensued.

"There is only one thing wrong, at this moment. No grog!"

To make the event more interesting for all, one of the men threw open a container of small ball bearings out into the arena. Umbleton immediately slipped on them and grasped for Kestarah.

This was beyond unreasonable. "Fight fairly," she taunted.

The leader slowly wagged his index finger side to side at her. "This is fair." He demonstrated how to move through the slippery bearings. Keeping both feet in firm contact with the deck, he made sliding outward crescent movements. This pushed the ball bearings away from his boot as he moved. "Now, you do this." He gestured for one of the others to toss him a borrowed broom stick to spar with her.

Kes was ready. Ball bearings or not, she wasn't without her resources. Years of dance at her father's demands about learning her mother's culture would come in handy in this situation.

She attacked first, brushing the bearings out of her way. A jete here might not be in her best interests but a piroutte wouldn't be too difficult. Especially one with a side-kick at the point of his nose. But for now, it was just starting. Too early in the game to show all of her moves.

"Stay out of this, Umbridge," Kes ordered. He didn't know what he was trying to involve himself in.

The leader squinted in a study of her. A grappling lunge against someone ready with a double-sided blade weapon wouldn't be wise. Neither would attempting to lock weapons using a broomstick. He smiled. The best solution was to sink into good footing and wield the stick a' la fencer. He swiped casual feints, preparing to launch into a flurry of hi-lo smacks to her head and legs. Unfortunately, the heroic Umbleton shot him in the back with his rent-a-cop stunphaser. Mr. Leader stood there fuming, fists clenching, "I kill men for less than that!"

Thanks to Officer Umbleton's brave call for backup, more security guards arrived to spoil everybody's fun. The best way to handle the Klingon males was to express deep relief and thanks for their arrival. Their Cardassian artillery gun was "badly needed" to cover an obscure, unpopulated corner of starbase.

As for the playful Klingon encounter with the upstart female, that would definitely have to be revisited after the war.

[OFF]

-------------------------------------------

Cmdr. Jordan Gunning
Kestarah M'Mara
Klingon Rubes [P: Steiner]

Starbase 332
Pegasus Fleet